Day 2 – 6/1/13

I woke up this day feeling like crap. The headache had not gone away while I slept. I no longer felt nauseous at least, but my head was still pounding away. I had my typical scrambled egg & fruit breakfast and hoped the food would help me. It did not. I took some Aleve to see if that would help more than the ibuprofen and managed to run a couple of errands with Mark, despite feeling crappy. I had to lie down and take a nap when we got back though, as the nausea was creeping back and ended up taking a 3 hour nap!! I felt a little better after waking up, so I ate the rest of the vegetable beef soup. My head was still achy, but I was bored out of my mind, so we drove around for a little bit looking at apartments. I started to feel nauseous again, so I had to lie down yet again once we got back.

I knew at that point there was no way I was going to be able to make the stuffed peppers and guacamole dinner I’d planned. I was trying to figure out what in the world we could pick up that would be Whole 30 compliant. We settled on Pappy’s, which would give me flavorful meat without extra seasonings or sauce that I couldn’t have. I ordered a large smoked chicken sandwich and just left the bun off, of course. I ate all of that chicken – it was delicious! I missed the barbecue sauce a little (which is saying something, considering Pappy’s sauce is mediocre at best), but it was good regardless. I had intended to cook some broccoli as well, but I was feeling so awful and ended up feeling full after the chicken, so I did not.

I tried to cherish how bad I felt as a way to keep myself from falling off the wagon, as I knew I’d have to deal with the pain more when I tried to get back on. I had read about someone else’s experience who made a good point: If we feel THIS awful going without the foods we were eating, imagine how bad they are for us. The scary thing is I didn’t even eat that poorly before. The only things I really had to cut out of my diet were milk, cheese, chocolate (and occasional candy), alcohol, and beans. I didn’t feel like I was eating that poorly at all (I maybe had fast food once a month, if that), but I still felt awful. I’m just grateful I wasn’t eating worse, as I might have felt even worse!

What really struck me about Day 2 and being sick was how much I have relied on food to make me feel better in the past. All I could think about was having a diet soda to settle my stomach, or eating delicious MSG-laden Ramen noodles, the soup my mom always served to me when I was sick as a kid. I knew that neither of those things would do anything to help me feel better, but the memories of having them when feeling sick in the past were so strong that I could not think of anything else that could help. As the night wore on and my headache pain continued to increase, all I could think about was dark chocolate, chewy Sweettarts, gummy bears, and sour gummy worms – all of my favorite candies. Again, I knew they wouldn’t make me feel better (probably worse), but I could NOT stop thinking about them. Mark and I were bummed about our apartment situation on top of all of that, so I was also tempted to say “Let’s just go to the Fountain”. It’s truly amazing how much we rely on sugar and “treats” as a means of comforting ourselves in times of sickness or sadness. Thus, Day 2 helped me realize that I am going to have to come up with other ways of making myself feel better, as I rely on food even more than I was aware.

I was in so much pain that we were considering taking me to the ER, but my mom (thankfully) suggested I take Excedrin migraine. That stuff is a Godsend. The pressure in my head started decreasing about 20 minutes after I took it and by the time I went to bed, I felt 95% better. I had some grapes as a snack about 4 hours before bed, as a substitute for my insane sugar cravings. They helped a little, though I’d be lying if I said I didn’t dream of candy all night.

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